Tea Time With Trish: It’s All About Me!
Once again, I was at Starbuck’s writing this morning. This time I was re-writing my “About Me” page for my website, because I realized that my story has evolved since I wrote my last one and it was time to update. Once I started writing, the typing didn’t seem to end, and I basically ended up writing a short story of my life. Who knew I had so much to say?!
I do realize that I may (or not…we’ll see…who made the rules?) have to pare it down a bit for website purposes, however I thought I would still share it with you all through my blog.
I’ll give you fair warning, it is a bit lengthy, so grab a tea and settle in for the read. My Chai Tea Latte was ice cold before I finished writing this one!
Once you’re done reading I would absolutely love to hear you’re feedback, and any stories you have to share, so please email me at email@example.com.
Here it is:
Ok, so who is Trisha Savoia, and why am I qualified to help you along on this journey you may be considering embarking on. Well, if you already know me or have worked with me you’d know that I am very passionate about mentoring moms who want more out of life, and the reason this is so important to me is because I was there. I totally understand. I wanted more out of life, but didn’t know how to get it. Well, I got it…and now I want to share it!
I am a “recovering” people-pleaser, perfectionist, and over-analyser who really struggled with knowing who I truly was, and what I wanted. For many years I convinced myself that I was content with the scenario I had created, because quite frankly I didn’t know any better. But as with anything, if we don’t listen to the little nudges life is giving us, the nudges turn into shoves, and shoves turn into knockouts.
I’m happy to say that I started listening at the shove stage, so that my life didn’t need to get to the point of having something huge happen in order for me to make some much needed changes.
I absolutely love my life, even with all the bumps and bruises that sometimes happen along the way. The fact is life isn’t perfect, nor should it be. What has changed for me is that I am able to see the bigger picture of why everything is happening, and I have created a lifestyle for myself that helps me to respond with calm awareness.
BUT, it wasn’t always this way. For many years I kept myself stuck in a cycle of quiet despair and struggle. I felt that there was so much more to life, but I didn’t know what the “more” was, so of course had no idea on how to change it. Looking back I had classical signs of depression – putting little effort into how I dressed; calling in sick to work too often; waking up wanting to cry not knowing why; and overall lack of motivation. All of these symptoms added to my sense of having no control over my own life.
But probably worst of all was the guilt I had around wanting more. How selfish of me! How or why should I possibly want “more” when I had what appeared to be a very good life? There were people out there who were worse off than I was. What was wrong with me?
In going to a doctor, it was easy to diagnose…I was depressed and stressed. And in fact my doctor at the time very kindly gave me a reprieve from it all by recommending I take a leave from my teaching position.
That helped me to get away from a career as a Junior High Teacher that was no longer satisfying me, but it didn’t allow me to escape myself. There was still a nagging voice calling me to fill in the void that was missing. So I did…with busyness. And I have to say, that served its purpose for awhile. It made me feel like I had value; it made me feel appreciated by others; it made me feel like I was apart of something; it made me feel like I had something to offer; it made me feel productive – basically it satisfied my need for approval from others.
Well, as I’m sure you can image, filling the void with busyness and trying to survive by living based on others approval and opinions of me eventually took its toll. I was starting to feel angry, and was holding a lot of resentment. Where did that anger and resentment get directed you ask? Yep, at my family! I never wanted to be a “yeller, ” but that is exactly what I had turned into, and the title of “nag” was not one I proudly wore.
During that time, I spent countless hours surfing the internet, for lack of not knowing what else to do, in hopes that some amazing new idea or solution I hadn’t thought of would call out to me.
On the outside, my life really did look great. Being a school teacher appeared ideal. I mean come on, we get summers off…what more could I want? Why wouldn’t I want to go back? I had a great husband, healthy kids, fantastic friends, and supportive extended family. Sounds pretty good doesn’t it?
Well, it was pretty good, but I didn’t want to settle for pretty good. And thank God a part of me was not going to let me settle. This is where the “nag” part in me served a very good purpose. This is the part I now refer to as my Higher Self; the part that is calling me to move forward into being the best version of myself; the part that knows I deserve to be happy and fulfilled.
I have grown very good at listening to this side, and I can tell you, when I listen (although admittedly on occasion I still stubbornly refuse to initially listen, but eventually I always do) it has never led me astray. In fact, it has led me in a direction I never thought I would, or even could, go…and I have never been happier!
It led me on a journey of self-discovery and awareness that with each step increased my self-esteem and self-confidence. I finally knew who I was; what I wanted; what I valued. As this part of me expanded, it gave me the courage (and believe me, it took some courage…and gentle nudging by God, the Universe, Source – whatever you choose to call it), to finally let go of my teaching career, which for me symbolized security and my sense of who I was.
During that transition from career mom to stay-at-home mom, I really struggled with my identity of who I now was. Ok, sooo I’m “just” a mom now. Hmmm, now what? Looking back, and knowing what I know now, I wish I could have told myself at that time to just relax and enjoy it. To stop always striving (which I still need to remind myself of from time to time). To know that I may not always have that abundance of time to really focus on what I want to do and to be in the moment with my family.
Of course, I didn’t know better at the time, so I quickly rushed into figuring out what my next step was going to be. Who am I going to be now?! No time to rest, I need to be productive and show people that I really am still valuable!
Now, having said all that, I really don’t have any regrets, because I truly believe that everything happens for a reason, and that I am going to “get there” regardless of some of the detours I take. What I ended up doing during that time was registering to go back to school to become a Clinical Hypnotherapist, and I definitely have no regrets there. I learned so much, I met amazing people, and have been using hypnotherapy as a valuable tool in my practice.
At the same time, I was also documenting everything I had been learning and that I found was invaluable in helping me become the person I wanted to be. My drive behind doing this was that I had jumped from workshop to workshop, book to book, coach to coach, practitioner to practitioner…and I wished that there was ONE place that I could have found it all. So, that’s what I set out to do. I accumulated everything that I had been learning and put it into one concise place. As a result my program emerged, and at the same time so did Absolute Awareness.
I do want to point out, however, that once again I have no regrets in the amount of sources I needed to tap into in order to find what I needed, because for me obviously those were all parts of the puzzle that I needed for everything to fall into place. And I highly encourage seeking additional sources, because everything and everyone has something of value to share. But at the same time, I also realized that it’s not necessary for everyone, nor is it desirable for some, to jump from place to place in order to get the help they need or want.
As with everything, my journey evolves and as it does, so does my program. My path of self-discovery led me to study and understand our Universal Laws, therefore you will often hear me talk about energy. I defined what I value in myself and others, and from there created an Integrity Code for myself that I live and breathe by. I have also explored the world of the subconscious mind. And all of this has ultimately paved the way for me to establish a strong connection to my spiritual side.
If there is anything I have learned it is that our learning is never done…nor do I want it to be. I fully and truly believe that our purpose here is about self-growth and expanding into the best versions of ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. When we see this as our purpose, we start to see the bigger picture, and thus can relax into life a little more.
Now believe me, I am still far from perfect (psst, let that be our secret for now…there’s no need to burst my husband’s bubble), because I believe we are on a continuous path of learning and expanding. However, as a result of the process I went through, I have learned how to:
- create boundaries
- say no without guilt or little white lies
- not spread myself too thin
- refrain from yelling at the kids
- stop nagging my husband
- stop expecting people to be able to read my mind (they totally can’t by the way!)
- understand and deal with my emotions
- put myself first without guilt
- create time for myself, my kids, and my spouse
- slow down, and live in the moment
- understand my value and purpose
- be self-confident, and recognize that it is directly linked to me living in my integrity, and being authentic
- let my children be who they are
- create stronger, more genuine relationships
- be vulnerable, and allow people to see the real me
- recognize when my “ego mind” is kicking in, and be able to respond accordingly
- …And, as you can see, I have learned how to be able to own my strengths!
I have committed to following my passion and to use my knowledge, skills, intuition, and experience as a teacher, mother, woman, and Clincial Hypnotherapist to help mentor other women and mothers who feel a connection to my story.
In addition, a large part of my desire to work with mothers comes from my desire to help children to hold on to their intuitive sense, as well as for them to be allowed to be who they are. In order to do that, we as mothers have to own who we truly are. As we all know, we don’t teach by just our words, we teach by our example.
If you can relate to any parts of my story, and are feeling drawn to making changes in your life, or even if you just simply have some questions I invite you to connect with me where you can share your story, your struggles, your needs, and where we can get to know each other. You can reach me at 403 607-8710 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Trisha Savoia is founder/owner of Absolute Awareness, and creator of the Moms Who Want More Program. Through her programs, writing, and speaking she uses her skills and experience as a mother, teacher, & Clinical Hypnotherapist to mentor moms who want more out of their lives – mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.