change Tag

Why It Can Feel So Hard To Change

We think that our difficulty with trying to change is due to our lack of motivation, drive, determination, and perseverance.  We beat ourselves up; we make ourselves wrong.  But it isn’t about us at all.  The problem is the framework we were given.   There’s a reason so many of us are aiming for more; reaching for something beyond the ordinary.  It’s because our soul knows there’s more; it’s nudging us to expect more, to experience more, to love more, to enjoy more.  It’s badgering us to step into the full potential and unlimited possibilities that are meant for us.   …and it won’t stop til we listen.   Because of past conditioning, this does require some things to change.  The first starting with our mind.   But why does the change feel so hard?   You can affect change through the avenue of science (logic) or through the avenue of spirituality (spirit).  It’s all the same, just different vocabulary; just different points of access.   Although, by and large, I prefer to use the language of...

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Day 8 No Striving Challenge – 2 Habits of Perfectionism

When in the throes of Perfectionism, it not only impacts your own life, but it impacts those around you. Here’s why - Perfectionism brings with it a high standard to live up to and attain.   This high standard of living results in these two habits:   1) Being Hard on Yourself – In striving to maintain the outward vision of perfection, by default you end up being really hard on yourself. Along with this comes a lot of guilt and second-guessing.   2) Being Hard on Others – Since you hold yourself to such a high standard, it stands to reason that you also hold others to a high, and often impossible, standard. Your high and rigid expectations cause you to be tough on others, and you can be easily frustrated with others imperfections.   Another aspect to this is that you can try to “fix” other people. You may come from a place of thinking you are being thoughtful and helpful, however the truth is that your quest to “fix” others is invested...

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Day 6 No Striving Challenge – 4 Common Behaviors of Striving

In our quest for proving our value and worthiness we often get caught in one, if not all, of the common behaviors of striving. These behaviors are established with the underlying desire to get our emotional needs met, because at some level we feel a void.   But what these behaviors really accomplish is keeping us trapped in striving for something that is outside of ourselves.   4 Common Behaviors of Striving: Perfectionism People Pleasing Over-Analyzing Over-Achieving   Over time, more and more aspects of these behaviors dropped away for me. Sometimes, however, I met the releasing of them with a lot of resistance….and that was my indicator that it definitely was time to let them go.   When resistance kicks in, that is a really good sign that you are ready to let go of the behaviors that haven’t been serving you. Be warned - as what you no longer need rises to the surface, your ego mind gets louder!   Soul Team Chat What in your life feels like it is no longer serving you? Are you getting mind chatter around...

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Day 4 No Striving Challenge – What keeps us Striving?

What has been keeping us in Striving Mode?   …FEAR   In present day our fears don’t have the devastating consequences that our ancestors had to endure, but like it or not, we have been shaped by the centuries of scarcity, trauma, suffering, and danger. Our DNA embodies the survival instinct of our past generations – fight, flee, deny & control.   What we are striving and struggling to survive now doesn’t result in famine and death, however our bodies still naturally go into the fight or flight response whenever it feels a threat to its survival. The difference now is that it’s no longer a threat to our lives, but it’s a threat to the survival of our ego mind.   “What worked to cope with fear in earlier, lower frequency times now limits our potential.” ~Penney Pierce   Thankfully, we don’t have to remain victim to this way of being. Fear doesn’t need to be our driving force that keeps us striving to satisfy our ego minds.   Awareness plays a big part in...

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Day 1 No Striving Challenge – A Different Slant on GOALS

Whether you’ve been aware of it or not, striving has been at the core of your struggles, overwhelm and frustrations. It may not overtly appear that way, but striving has seeped into most aspects of our lives and has been affecting us at very deep levels.   We are either: Actively striving to change, fix or improve some aspect of our lives OR We feel GUILTY for NOT striving more to change, fix or improve some aspect of our lives   Either way, striving has got us on the hook.   Here’s the dictionary definition of striving – To make strenuous efforts toward any GOAL.   Today we are going to focus on the GOAL part of this definition.   Our current way of defining goals has been to place our desires and drives to achieve something outside of ourselves. This causes us to look and act externally to reach the achievement of that goal.   Because we are coming from an external viewpoint, we feel the weight of responsibility on us to achieve those goals by doing, taking action, and...

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