people pleasing Tag

The Lessons of a People-Pleaser

This quote encompasses a huge learning I had to go through to continue to release my people-pleasing tendencies. Being a “recovering” people-pleaser, the idea of someone being upset with me, or not agreeing with what I said or even how I said it absolutely made we lose sleep. It somehow made me feel that what I was doing or saying was “bad.” That there was something about me that was “wrong” and I needed to figure out how to adjust myself and my behaviour to be “better.” As I began on my personal growth journey it became very obvious early on that this would be one of my greatest lessons…and that it was also a two-part lesson. The first part was learning to speak my truth. The second was being okay with how others took it when I did. What I came to know and understand was that in accepting myself, my beliefs, and my values meant not necessarily everyone would agree with me. BUT if I was okay with who I was,...

Read More

Trisha’s Two-Cent Tuesday: Do You Allow Your Children Their Own Voice?

The other week, I had a friend come over, and she had asked my son, Jaden, if it was okay if she could give him a hug.  Jaden was hesitant, and I could see that we was struggling between doing what he wanted (which was not to hug her), and having to risk saying no and possibly offending her.   Myself, as well as my friend, encouraged him to answer truthfully according to what he wanted and how he felt.  He said no.   We both respected his decision, and in fact, I was quite proud of him for speaking up for what he knew was true for himself, and honouring his own feelings.   My Two-Cents? So many times, we as parents, encourage our kids to go against their better judgement and their own emotions.  And the reason we do this is because of our own need to please.   If we allow our children the space to make their own decisions in those moments, we are helping...

Read More