Tea Time with Trish: Part 4 – Strength In Our Vulnerability
UNEXPECTED GIFTS FROM A GETAWAY
I fully expected to report back about how absolutely blissful my 3 day getaway to Banff was, but as you may have already read in Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 there were many unexpected gifts, in the form of lessons, that I received from this getaway.
I will continue to share what I learned…
As I mentioned in the first post titled “Wait…This Isn’t How Its Suppose To Go, ” I realized that there were emotions lingering just below the surface that had affected me, yet I didn’t want to look at.
Since I am an avid journaller, and meditater (I’m totally making up words, but that’s okay I used to teach Gr. 9 English…it’s called creative licence!) I had mistakenly believed that this practice alone would deal with anything that needed to be dealt with…at times it does…HOWEVER, what I have come to realize is that no practice can take the place of fully and completely listening and honouring our guidance system…which is our emotions.
With this in mind, I wanted to figure out why I had pushed these feelings down…and it didn’t take me too long to figure out!
I view myself as a strong, independent woman, and in most cases this is a great thing. However, as with all things there are always extremes. At times being strong and independent can lead us to think we can handle everything on our own, and that it is a sign of weakness when we do need help or when something seemingly “small” affects us.
This was the case with these emotions I had suppressed. I have long prided (pride is such a tricky emotion) myself on the fact that I seldom get my feelings hurt. I am very good at reframing situations and knowing what others say is rarely really about me, but I can also take ownership of my part in it. Although this is true, and this is a strength I have, the truth of the matter is I am still human and there will be times that my sensitivity will be tested.
In this case, words had been said, and on one level I knew that it had nothing to do with me, but more-so of the person expressing these words, however at some level they did trigger me…mainly because they had been expressed several times. I knew these simple comments “shouldn’t” affect me, so at the expense of letting myself down, I instead refused to acknowledge that they did leave an impact.
What became glaringly obvious to me during my stay in Banffwas that no matter how much we try to neglect how we feel, they are sitting there ready to surface the moment we let our guard down. Once I had allowed myself time to slow down and quiet my mind, the feelings rushed in to remind me that they hadn’t been dealt with.
Once I acknowledged them, dealt with the source, and reframed them to make myself feel better, they no longer unknowingly plagued me, and thereby had also released tension that I had been holding onto.
My reason for sharing this is because many of us are strong, independent women, and because of that we can sometimes neglect our true needs. Regardless of our capabilities everyone needs a little help from time to time, and when we have our moments that we “view” as weak, they in fact are not weaknesses at all. Being able to acknowledge our emotions and our needs is a true sign of strength…and something I know I want to be able to pass down to my children.
There is a pure strength in being able to show our vulnerabilities. And if we come to believe and accept this statement as true, we will start to give ourselves the time, attention, and love that we need, and in doing so we give ourselves the space that allows us to know ourselves, thus create happier, more fulfilling lives for us, as well as our families.
It absolutely amazes me how many awarenesses and aha moments I received from that one day in Banff. As I mentioned previously, day one was great, but it was day 2 that took me on an emotional roller coaster. Having sifted through all of that, by day 3 I truly was able to immerse myself into the self-care I was needing. I was booked into the spa, and I pampered myself without the subconscious hidden agenda.
Once home, I continued to receive some deeper awarenesses as a ripple effect of my time inBanff. Stay tuned for my continued journey next week in Part 5 of the series “Unexpected Gifts From A Getaway.”
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Trisha Savoia is founder/owner of Absolute Awareness, and creator of the Moms Who Want More Program. Through her programs, writing, and speaking she uses her skills and experience as a mother, teacher, & Clinical Hypnotherapist to mentor moms who want more out of their lives – mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. She teaches moms how to slow down, peel away the layers to find their true selves, and to listen to their intuitive sense so that they can create a sense of fulfillment, meaning, and happiness in their lives.