Tea Time with Trish: Part 6 – Really, What is Balance?
UNEXPECTED GIFTS FROM A GETAWAY
One of my take aways from my trip to Banff (click here for the first 5 parts) was to question more deeply what it really means to be in balance. I have learned from my own experience that is not reasonable to expect that every single day is going to be perfectly in balance, or that there will always be equal time spent between work, activities, and family. So then, what does it mean? This is how I have come to understand it:
I believe that we need to relate balance to the balance of nature. Everything in life has an ebb and a flow, and so will be the same when it comes to creating balance within our life. We would drive ourselves crazy if we insisted on everything being in equal parts in all areas of our lives at all times.
If you look at the cycles of nature there is a time for action, and a time for rest. This can easily be illustrated in the life of a caterpillar, or the changing of seasons. Taking the example of seasons – the spring is a time of action, planting the seeds; the summer is a time to enjoy and receive the abundance of beauty that has come to life through the action of it being planted; fall is a time of slowing down and giving back; winter is a time to rest and hibernate, where on the surface it appears for the most part dormant however underneath it all there is activity that goes unnoticed to the naked eye.
If we can relate our own lives to the cycle of nature, it becomes apparent that we have our own cycle of action and rest, and our job lies in our ability to listen to when we need to make that transition…and the way to make those transitions easier is to become fully in tune with our emotions…our intuition.
Understanding that our lives emulate that of nature, knowing there is always an ebb and a flow, we can let go of the guilt and the rigidity we put on ourselves to have everything “just so.”
Relating this to my experience in Banff, what I now realize is that I was fully aware that I was transitioning from a time of action into a time of rest, however my ego mind was still trying to grasp on to the belief that being productive is important, and that the more I do the further I get. Even though on a conscious level, I know that that only leads to burn out, there was a part of me that was a little afraid to completely let go.
With a little coaxing through self-talk I thankfully gave myself permission to be in a state of rest knowing full well that this state is needed if I am to continue thriving instead of just surviving.
Taking this beyond my Banffexperience, the same applies in my everyday life, both personal and professional. I find I go through times of being very sociable and have a desire to be around people, but then a time always comes of needing my own space and solitude. This applies for children as well. So often we have them in such structured schedules, thinking this is a great way to provide opportunity and growth, but they also abide by the cycles of nature and need time and space of their own. Not allowing this is when we begin to see changes in their behaviour.
I believe the key to creating balance in our life is to really listen to what our needs are in the moment and follow that. If you feel the need to let go of the household duties for a few days, honour that; the house won’t fall apart. If you feel the need to be with friends, honour that. If you feel the need to clean the storage room, honour that. If you feel the need to spend some extra time on work related tasks, honour that. All the while knowing that by listening, it will always come back into balance.
For me, I can feel when the cycle has already changed and I am very aware that its time to switch gears, but my greater learning is now really listening to the need to change before the transition begins, so that I can flow more easily as the seasons change. This is the problem I encountered with my getaway. I knew it was time to switch gears, but I wasn’t listening to it as it was approaching, so when the time came to relax I was in a bit of a resistance mode.
One thing I want to make clear before coming to an end is that as with winter, which is a time of rest, there is still some action occuring, however it happens with a calmness behind it. So, when I say it is time to relax I do not mean that all things come to a halt…we are still to take any inspired action we receive, however still allow ourselves to relax to a slower pace.
And one final note that I wanted to include is that I had a desire for my getaway to “hopefully” also allow me to “get ahead of the game” with my writing, and during my entire 3 days there I was never hit with any inspiring ideas to write about. HOWEVER, after giving myself the pleasure of enjoying the reminder of my time there and to enjoy my third day of pampering unrestricted, the end result was that I ended up with what I feel is great writing material (okay, I’m a little biased!) in the form of this 6 part series! Now, how cool is that?!!!
So to sum up, balance isn’t so much about balancing all aspects of your life equally, but is a matter of listening to your intuition of what is needed in each moment. By listening, trusting, and following you will always feel balanced in body, mind and soul.
To learn more about my work visit http://www.AbsoluteAwareness.ca
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Trisha Savoia is founder/owner of Absolute Awareness, and creator of the Moms Who Want More Program. Through her programs, writing, and speaking she uses her skills and experience as a mother, teacher, & Clinical Hypnotherapist to mentor moms who want more out of their lives – mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. She teaches moms how to slow down, peel away the layers to find their true selves, and to listen to their intuitive sense so that they can create a sense of fulfillment, meaning, and happiness in their lives.